Books books books

Last night I finished 1984. It's about time, too... it only took me three years, haha. Anyways, I must say I am glad I read it, though I'm going to take a break from the dystopia books for a while. Had it not been for my true push to finally finish the book, and my self-made rule that I couldn't read anything else until I finished one of my books-in-progress, I might have put it back down. The ending is a very uncomfortable one, and I tell you, when he looked at himself in the mirror, that was the worst of it for me. I can't explain why, but it was. Anyways, still glad I read it and it's 'message' is kind of percolating in my brain right now.

So I woke up early this morning in order to get a good shower in, since I'm heading to the hospital and won't get one for another week. And I had time to start another book. I chose to start reading Crazy Love: Overwhelmed by a Relentless God. I started the book, and after 20 minutes of reading, I closed it. I decided to look up the reviews on Amazon about the book. I was specifically hoping to find someone out there who said something like "Being a Catholic, I still thought this book was great" but I found no such thing. I found one review that said this: "His disclaimers aside, it is my opinion that Francis truly, deep down, believes that the believer's work is mystically tied into their salvation. His denials are only at a superficial level so that he can remain "evangelical" and avoid the necessary soul-searching that might lead him toward a Roman Catholic-esque theology." which I found interesting. Anyways, let me step back and explain this Amazonian search: the book was written to "Christians" and had lingo of "Being a good American Christian" and things like that, and I just can't get into that. Catholicism is still Christian, yes, but there is a huge difference between our beliefs and those of a non-denominational Christian (the author.) Never once has my priest ever, EVER said in mass "as good Christians we should blah blah blah." (he usually says good stewards, servants, or something like that.)

Needless to say, I'm taking this book back. I'm sure there's a nice message in it, but it's just not for me. Plus, the whole thing is just one big ongoing sermon. Nah, I think I'll pass. And if I do feel the need to read it, I'll get it from the library.

State of the Lungs Address

Well folks, it's that time again—3:30am when Jamie is coughing and decides to write a blog! Yay for that... not exactly.

Anyways, I had a doctor's appointment today and, well, it did not go so great. It was a follow-up to my December appointment, in which my PFT numbers were lower, so they had me do a course of antibiotics by mouth, at home. So basically, this was a check to see if I'd gotten better or not.

I did my PFT (pulmonary function test) and was shocked by the results, a bad shocked. The lady asked me "Have you been sick?" I said no. But even after a few more tries, my numbers never improved. At that moment, she grabbed a pulse/ox and my oxygen levels were only 94%, which is not terrible but fairly low for me as I am usually in the 97%+ range. I can't remember the total volume of air I blew out, but my FEV1 (which is the amount of air blown out within the first second) was at 33%. This was 10% lower than last time, in December, which is a huge drop. What this all means is that for a person of my height and weight, my lungs are expelling 33% of the air they should be. In other words, 33%-ish of my lungs is working, the rest is sort of on sick leave. There are other amounts measured in the PFT, such as total volume and FEV2 (2 seconds) but the FEV1 is what most of their diagnosis is based on. I'm not totally sure as to why this is, but studies and such over the years and years of CF care have shown that this number, more than the others, indicates most accurately how the person is feeling and the rate their lungs are declining.

This all was quite a shock for me, actually. I have not felt terrible and my cough hasn't been outrageously bad (the cough is usually what signals to me that it's time for a tune-up.) I'm a tad short of breath, but even that isn't that bad. So as I was sitting waiting for the doctor, I was on the verge of tears. The news was just unexpected and I didn't think I should be coming back in the hospital this soon, which is what I knew we would have to do.

So, yes, this means a trip to the hospital for me. I am planning to go in next week. I guess I should be thankful I don't feel that bad that I need to come in tomorrow. Jarrod and I will celebrate our anniversary this Saturday, and I would like to at least enjoy that (as much as I can.) We've been together for five years. Also, I wanted to see our friends at Trivia Night this weekend too.

I'm pretty bummed about the whole thing, but I'm sure tomorrow will be better. This is all just a part of a 'routine' for me, so it's nothing too crazy, I suppose.

House update

Well we've barely been in the house for a week and we have started painting. I was over there yesterday to try my hand at it, and for a first-timer I think I did pretty good. I gave a shot at cutting it too, doing the edging around door frames, the ceiling, etc. Obviously painting a house is different than painting a canvas, but it came fairly natural for me since I did previously paint paintings. The biggest difference was that this paint dries much faster. I never worked with oils, which are the most viscous and slow-drying, but took a liking to acrylics. Acrylics are still a little more workable than latex wall paint, so you have to work semi-fast.

Anyhoo, we have done all the blue rooms so far and Jarrod is starting on the green today. So far, I really like the blue color I chose (which is good, haha.) It is exactly what I hoped for: it would look blue, but it wouldn't be like "Hey I'm BLUE," in-your-face blue.

I brought a handful of things over to the house yesterday, such as my dishes from college, some extra plastic plates, plastic cups, and some plastic flatware. Mom and I need to take a trip back to Cosco and get a huge box of that stuff sometime, so in the meantime, I never thought I'd necessarily do this, but I am washing the plastic so we can reuse because I don't have all that much, haha. Jarrod is going to move in there sometime soon, so we'll need to decide if we wanna continue with this big box of plastic stuff or buy some cheapy silverware for him to use until we get some good stuff. I don't know yet. I already have a big list of new things to bring with me next time I go over there.

And on another note, I am so happy to be better! Thursday and Friday I was home with a bad stomach flu. I honestly don't know that I've ever had a true 'stomach flu' like this... the kind where you can't keep anything down and the whole bit. Thursday night my supper consisted of beef broth and oyster crackers. Friday I was able to handle a little more as the day went on, and I actually had a turkey and mashed potatoes meal from Bob Evans that night. It went well, and my stomach didn't feel too crazy, and I was sooooo happy to have FOOD again. Anyways, yesterday I felt fine and was able to eat semi-normal again. I obviously didn't dive in and eat fried food or hot wings or something, but I didn't feel bad at all yesterday. I was so thankful! It felt great to be able to eat again.

New year post one

Happy New Year, whoever reads this!

Well, tomorrow is a big day for Jarrod and me: we close on our house. I am praying tonight that everything goes smoothly and we aren't there for hours and hours waiting on... something.

Today mom and I went around and did a little shopping. I used some of my Christmas money to buy some sweat pants I didn't get for Christmas. The exciting part is they were on clearance at Aeropostale, so yay for that! Then we went to Bed, Bath, & Beyond where I finished up a few things on my registry. Then we went to Costco for the usual random giant items.

I have to tell you something exciting, though. First of all, I'm excited for our new house. It's new, it's small, it's perfect for us. Second of all, I'm excited about my paint colors! I finally decided on them today, and I have a fun little side story:

I was debating between a light mauve or green for our bathroom. I picked out towels and accessories earlier that were dark brown, and they went with both of the paint swatches I had brought, so no problems there. Anyways, tonight I decided to read up a little on paint colors and choosing them. So I was reading about have a "color scheme" and then I realized something: all of my colors I'd picked out were all earth-tones! I had a blue, a green, and a tan. The only one that didn't fit that "scheme" was the purple. So that was the nail in the coffin: no purple. I am super excited now, because I honestly didn't even realize this whole 'earthy' feel I've got goin'. But it's awesome because I love being outside, I love trees, I love birds, and I love fresh air so I think it was some awesome sub-conscious thing that I gravitated towards these colors. Call me crazy.

So the THIRD thing I'm excited about is the hall bathroom. Briefer side story: I'd been debating what to do with it. I like ducks, but didn't know if I should do that in the new house. I don't feel like I can shove my cutesy-loving personality to the side constantly, but I didn't know that ducks were the way to go. Today at BBB, I found an even BETTER solution: hummingbirds! They had a shower curtain and whole ensemble that was a very sophisticated blue, tan, and white with a hummingbird design. I loved it, and I am so excited that I found it, seeing as I love hummingbirds. More than ducks, too.